From ConservativeAction.org:

Fifteen Reasons Why Nixon Was Better Than Clinton

by James Young

Over the last twenty years, surveys have often been published reflecting historians' views of Presidential administrations. Harry S Truman, much maligned while in office, has regularly risen in the esteem of many historians. The Great Communicator, Ronald Reagan, has seen his historical stock rise even as his mental faculties have become subject to the ravages of Alzheimer's Disease.

Thus, we come to the Great Prevaricator, William Jefferson Blythe Clinton. The "Boy President," as the American Spectator's Bob Tyrrell calls him, becomes more and more akin to another President we remember in these dog days of August: Richard Milhous Nixon. But the comparisons are unfair and inappropriate.

To Nixon.

A few years back, humorist P.J. O'Rourke offered a long list of why Jimmy Carter was better than Clinton. That, too, was unfair to the former President. So, for your reading pleasure, your intrepid correspondent offers the following reasons why Nixon was better than Clinton.

  1. Nixon went to China to further American geopolitical interests; Clinton went to China to thank his campaign contributors.
  2. Nixon negotiated the ABM Treaty to preserve the doctrine of Mutual Assured Destruction (MAD), knowing of America's parity in a bi-polar world; Clinton gave guidance technology to the Chinese, and stood idly by while nuclear weapons proliferated.
  3. Nixon brought our troops home from Indochina; Clinton sent our troops to Bosnia and Somalia.
  4. Nixon's tax-dodging Vice President was "assassination insurance"; Clinton's election- law-dodging Vice President is "impeachment insurance."
  5. Nixon was re-elected in a landslide with more than 60% of the popular vote; Clinton couldn't get even half the vote for his re-election.
  6. Nixon got caught showing undeserved loyalty to aides who broke the law and their oaths; Clinton's getting caught notwithstanding undeserved loyalty from aides trying to hide his violations of law and his oaths (marital and constitutional).
  7. Nixon gave abuse of power a bad name; Clinton is giving perjury in a civil case a good name
  8. Nixon had to worry about the audio tapes; Clinton has to worry about video tapes.
  9. Nixon had Pat's good cloth Republican coat; Clinton has Monica's stained dress.
  10. Nixon's tapes went to the National Archives; Clinton's tapes are going to the MPAA for an NC-17 rating.
  11. When entertainment types like Elvis and the Carpenters visited Nixon's White House, he looked uncomfortable and out of his element; when they visit the Clinton White House, they make policy and run the travel office.
  12. Nixon made headlines by saying he's "not a crook"; Clinton makes headlines by promising to "tell the truth."
  13. "Deep Throat" used in connection with the Nixon White House is a noun; "Deep Throat" used in connection with the Clinton White House is a verb.
  14. When someone got down on their knees in the Nixon White House, it was the Secretary of State, to pray with him.
  15. Nixon's daughters were prettier.
And finally, one reason why Clinton is better than Nixon:

Nixon did nothing to stop the creeping socialism he inherited from LBJ; Clinton proved that Ronald Reagan was right, and that, with spending controls, we could grow our way out of the deficit.

James Young regularly writes for the Potomac News. He lives with his family in Montclair.

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